The concept of time and how we interact with it daily is, sometimes, taken for granted. Its importance differs from one person to another; while some highly cherish it, others don’t. Perhaps they don’t realize their interaction with it as they tend to take things slow. Time is a precise concept, precious too, but somewhat stressful at times. People can develop anxiety and stress because of time, lack of management, for instance.
Because of how fast we live now, we have appropriated our days based on time to get things completed. It gradually, but indeed, became a gauging tool. However, we rarely discuss time relevance to grief, happiness, or letting go. It goes beyond the productivity angle, but it connects with our feelings towards many things.
The other day I was talking with a friend, and out of frustration throughout our discussion, I told her, for how long are we going to depend on time to let go of things, places, and people. I realized at that moment that I was angry and suddenly tears escaped my eyes. I was not sad, but I was angry. My friend’s reply was surprising but soothing. She said we don’t have another solution, and our destiny is strange and challenging. After that, I dwelled on her answer for a while. It was a wake-up call to think about my relationship with time.
I tend to deal with it as a productivity measure throughout my day. Either in house chores, appointments, or work-wise. But my friend’s answer made me realize that my relationship with time goes beyond productivity. Surely many will relate! I have always depended on time to let go, and it is never easy, no matter how used to it I am. When I was younger, I used to have attachment issues with many things, but living on my own taught me never to get attached to anything, and I eventually gained numbness because of the repetitiveness of the practice. Here, things are temporary, even if there is a sense of stability.
It wasn’t always easy to let go, but the numbness helped me forget and move on quickly. Recalling when tears escaped my eyes out of frustration, that moment helped me recognize how frustrating letting go could be. It is okay to admit that I knew I could still be angry and accept the feeling. Resistance is also part of numbness.
It is okay to comprehend what you need to let go of and grieve. Your feelings are valid, whatever they are, but never try to escape them. The same tool you are using to get used to a harsh reality can hurt you at some point, so never rush the process. It is as if you bury your feelings when you use the time to let go so you can get back to the former reality as fast as you can. I learned this the hard way, but I appreciated the realization later because it gave me the chance to see what I used to do wrong. Take your time adjusting to the new reality, feel your feelings, admit but most importantly, accept what went wrong.