I found a trending reel on Instagram which shows many female users reflecting on their younger selves throughout different ages. Although I use Instagram as a private account, I have always considered it my online photos album. So watching how many women reflected on their lives and the kind of thoughts and decisions they highlighted was inspiring. So, I decided to jump on this trend and make a small reflection. It is funny because I rarely look back at my younger selves and what they would think of my life today and the good and bad decisions I made until this day. This article will reflect on four to five different age timelines to this day.
What Would My Younger Selves Think?
The 12-year-old me would be shocked to know that I became a blogger/writer. My younger self at that age admired writers and their ability to articulate their feelings and thoughts so eloquently. Writers made it seem effortless. When the blogger I am today knows how challenging it is. But at the same time, how freeing writing made me feel. When I was 12, my English wasn’t perfect, but I was already trying to practice it as much as I could. At that time, in particular, I remember spending a lot of time with my family moving from one household to another. It wasn’t the easiest time for my family and me. However, I recall telling myself to study as hard as I could because it was the only thing that would make things right in the future.
The 16-year-old me would never believe that I live in France now. The place never crossed my mind, not even as a theory or assumption. I never thought of moving to Europe in the first place. I have always considered Europe as a crossing point to a final destination. Yet, it doesn’t mean that it is my final destination, it could be, but I cannot guarantee it yet. Moving here made me acknowledge that things will not always go our way no matter how hard we plan. I always view myself as a planner, but I never planned any of the beautiful things that happened to me.
My 20-year-old self would be proud that I made my well-being and mental health a priority. At that age, I never gave my mental health a priority. I was still an undergraduate student, working part-time to finance myself and discover life away from being a student. In my second year, I started working as a part-time teacher throughout my university days back home. With the rush of life, I never paid my mental health attention. I eventually did it after moving to France when it hit me the hard way because of many miscalculations.
My 23-year-old self would be both happy and proud that I took the risk and changed my major. Eventually, to do what I love the most. It was scary and incredibly challenging, but today, I am happy I made that decision. It doesn’t mean that I didn’t enjoy my first degree. Deep down, I knew something was better for me to pursue and to make a career out of it. My younger self, at 23, would be happy that I let go of toxic people and situations that made me struggle emotionally and not feel worthy of love and kindness. My younger self would also be glad I didn’t settle for less, even when I convinced myself it was okay to fill a void.
Today, my almost 28-year-old self is thankful for everything. All the bad things opened my eyes to new realities and opportunities. All the good stuff made me more content and encouraged me to do and be better. I am reflecting on everything and everyone I come across. I hope I managed to create healthy boundaries, and I highly value those in my life.
Most importantly, I accept, and I am learning from my mistakes. I am grateful for all the memories I made back home and away from home, Libya, knowing that I will make more in the future. In other words, to answer the question, I think my younger self would be proud.